Behaviors You’re Doing That You May Not Realize Are Rude

If you were asked whether you were rude, you’d probably say no. Ideally, no one wakes up in the morning with plans of being rude to others. It’s certainly safe to assume that no one wants to consider themselves to be rude, but there are some rude behaviors that you may not even realize have become part of your routine.

Being polite is easy, but it starts with recognizing when and how you’re being rude. While none of us are perfect, it’s important to identify and eliminate some of the behaviors that we’re going to discuss today.

Doing so not only allows you to be the friend that others need, but it also helps you protect the relationships you have while fostering deeper, more meaningful connections. Today, ask yourself if you’re prone to any of these behaviors and start making changes as necessary.

Interrupting Others

When you interrupt others while they’re speaking, it comes across as rude and dismissive. This is largely because it indicates that you’re focused more on how you’re going to respond to what someone is saying than actively listening to their words.

Even if you’re excited to share some insight into what the discussion at hand is, it’s important to remember that you shouldn’t speak until the other person is done talking.

Fortunately, interrupting others is one of the easiest behaviors to avoid when you’re trying to be a kinder, more polite person. If you catch yourself interrupting others, pause, apologize, and encourage them to continue.

Eventually, you’ll get used to waiting for it to be your turn to speak. Keep in mind that what you’re thinking and what you want to say is no more important than what the other person is sharing.

Checking Your Phone During Conversations

Cellphones are part of our daily lives. You probably use your phone for everything from social connections to work to checking the weather.

With that being said, it’s important to avoid prioritizing devices over other people, even if you’re using your phone to interact with others. Most people have access to hundreds of people on their cellphones. That number can easily reach the thousands when you consider how many people you’re connected to on social media.

Obviously, there are emergencies during which you’ll need to put off the in-person conversation that you’re having. However, a random text message from a friend is not an emergency.

Pulling out your phone and scrolling through your social media platforms while you’re having a conversation with someone is one of the rudest behaviors that you can take part in.

Even if you think it’s normal to casually glance at your phone during a conversation, it indicates that what’s happening on your phone is more important than the person across the table from you, which is an inherently rude behavior. Be mindful of your cellphone when you’re talking to others by staying off of it if at all possible.

Mistreating Service Staff

When you think of rude behavior in a restaurant, you may think of someone who berates the service staff. While that’s certainly one of the most extreme instances of rude behavior, there are other ways that people act rudely when dealing with others, especially in a service setting, that don’t involve loud, angry words and insults.

Even if it’s not a conscious decision, ignoring people in customer service roles, such as cashiers, waiters, and baristas, is rude.

Unfortunately, many people don’t think about the person standing across the counter from them during a transaction. How many times have you paid for your morning coffee while responding to a text message or checking your email?

When you do that, you’re indicating that the human who is on the other side of the transaction isn’t as important as the message that you’re responding to.

The wait staff at your favorite restaurant and the cashiers at your local grocery stores are there to ensure that you have a pleasant experience.

Even if you’ve never considered ignoring them as rude, it’s a behavior to avoid going forward. Even if you can’t get into a full conversation with these people, acknowledging them and acting professionally during your interactions is the epitome of polite behavior.

Being Late Without Notice

Everyone deals with things that knock them off their schedule from time to time. When you agree to meet a friend for dinner at six, you may get stuck at work late or run into heavy traffic that makes it impossible to get to the restaurant.

While punctuality is not only responsible but polite, there is nothing wrong with occasionally being late when it’s out of your control. However, even in those instances, it’s rude to not let the other person (or people) know that you’re going to be late.

There’s nothing more polite than making a concerted effort to be on time. People who choose to be habitually late or brush it off as nothing major are telling others that their time doesn’t matter.

However, when things do come up, be sure to let the people know who are going to be affected by your tardiness. This isn’t about making yourself feel bad for being late, but it’s a simple, polite action that lets others know that you value their time and you’re sorry about your tardiness.

Being Too Loud in Public

This rude behavior goes along with the overuse of cellphones that is so prevalent in our modern culture. However, being loud in public doesn’t only apply to people who choose to blast their music at full volume or carry on loud phone conversations in public.

Take for instance how loud things can get when a group of friends meet at a restaurant. While there’s certainly nothing wrong with laughing and enjoying the company of others, the rest of the restaurant isn’t all that interested in the funny story that you’re sharing with your friends.

The people who share a public space with you don’t need to know about the details of your conversations.

Nor do they need to hear the music playing from your phone when you’re hanging out in the local park or at the beach. Being mindful of others is the hallmark of being polite, and controlling your volume when you’re in public is one of the most mindful steps that you can take.

Oversharing Personal Information

This is an example of a rude behavior that comes as a surprise to some people, especially those who believe that being completely transparent is a sign of authenticity.

Being completely transparent with your closest friends may not be rude, but when that oversharing starts to bleed over into professional interactions or public conversations with people close to you, it becomes problematic.

Personal, private details of your life should be kept to yourself in virtually every situation. While it’s great to have someone you can talk about everything with, try to keep those conversations between only the two of you.

Forgetting Your Pleases and Thank Yous

When you were a child, there was probably at least one adult in your life who tried to teach you the importance of using please and thank you in your interactions with others. Sadly, those phrases become less common as we get older.

It’s unlikely that you fail to say “please” and “thank you” because you’re trying to be rude. Instead, we just don’t think about those words as much when we get older and there isn’t someone telling us to use them.

What if you started saying “please” every time you asked someone for something? Furthermore, what if you offered a “thank you” whenever someone did something for you, no matter how minor? Not only is this polite behavior, but it can have a major impact on the day that someone else is having.

Avoid These Rude Behaviors

Being polite is as easy as being mindful of other people. It’s truly not hard to avoid being rude, whether you’re interacting with one other person or standing in a room full of strangers.

In virtually every case, simply putting yourself in the shoes of the other person (or people) around you can help you choose polite, mindful behaviors.